Grace in Culture Shock---it's called tears and friends.

Several years ago after my first trip to the jungles of Mexico on a mission trip and the simplicity of life but backbreaking labor; the poverty but great faith, the lack of things but the wealth of love and community I was told to be prepared for culture shock when I returned home. I thought I had...I prayed, I wrote in my journal, I spoke to those who had similar experiences. But the first time I walked into Kroger (major grocery store in the USA) and wanted to buy some toilet paper and coffee I was overwhelmed by the choices. I couldn't make a decision even though I had been buying the same brands for years. I stood paralyzed. Tears filled my eyes and I left without purchasing anything. 

Even though people were interested in my stories I had to learn to keep them condensed, simple. I had to wait until asked. And sometimes I just didn't want to talk about the things I had seen and done. The time and place were not proper. 

I have already found the same true about my Camino experience. I have talked with people who have never heard of the Camino who have dismissed me. Talked with people who have heard of the Camino and almost made a joke as to whether I found "the way". And talked with people who have heard something so asked me questions and from a part of my story said I have inspired them to put this on their bucket list. ;)

I do not write this as a way to gain sympathy. But rather as an explanation. I have been away for almost 60 days. The technology has been less than stellar. But I have dealt with it. The friends I have met on the Camino some have come and gone but others are lifelong friends--and I treasure this. 

So I share with you what a sweet, dear friend sent me last night, concerned about my re-entry into life after the Camino. 

"I know in your line of profession you see and hear this often but I still wanted to reach out. You're homecoming is so similar to a deployed soldier's return and you will experience a lot of mixed emotions. You grew and changed so much spiritually and emotionally or at least that is how I felt when I came home. I had so much time to think and "alone" time that I actually found myself depressed at times when I came home. There were times I didn't want to be around family because they kept hovering over me then they kept asking what was wrong. 

Don't get me wrong, I was so happy to be back with family and friends, to sleep in my own bed but I also needed my alone time. I missed the people I met during deployment knowing I would probably never see them again in this lifetime...

...Please take it easy and don't rush back to the life before Camino because you have changed. We all love you and want to see you and hear first hand your stories but in your time."

At least the way the world works I will be able to keep in touch with my new friends as I come back home to so many special people. And who knows maybe I will see them again on the Camino, the Way-in this life but certainly in the life to come. 

Just know that I love my people dearly. And it will take me time to adjust. But I will. I climbed mountains, walked on blistered feet, in searing heat, and fog and rain. I can, with the grace of God and your continued support, love, and understanding continue my journey. "For as the walk ends the Camino continues..."